We live in an involving world where different is being accepted. Masculinity has been passed down from generations to generations and has not evolved into something healthy for men. The word masculinity is to be in power and always in dominance. These are some words associated with the traditional term. We are condition to hear men to shut down any kind of emotion as the simple reaction of crying can make them less manly. Men are trapped into having to prove to the world something they might not be. This can lead to violence as that is one of the traits of toxic masculinity.
Traditional masculinity or any other kind of masculinity should stop existing as it’s a social pressure that is harming not only men but to everyone around them. The idea of masculinity has a link to violence and mass shootings. With many mass shootings done by men we conclude that their mental health is unhealthy. We must educate the negatives the concept every man is taught through all kinds of outlets. Violence is something that is becoming less acceptable and it’s important to stand up from it as it can lead to a bigger problem later. The change of how we see men should be in the top of our concerns to stop all the violence that is produced by the entitlement they are taught to have. It’s important for men to realize that life is unfair, and everyone is going through things and asking for help is better than violence.
In the article “Toxic Masculinity and Murder” by James Hamblin, states that 98% of mass murders has been done by men (Hamblin). The statistic of this piece of information has a lot of a thought to it. Why are men committing all this hate crimes when women are going through the same things life problems. For examples all genders have bad relationships and bad jobs. According to sociologist Eric Madfis, goes on to say men who commit mass shootings may be caused by cultural standards of how they are expected to react to act. Men are constantly being judged today. If they don’t have a good paying job than they are just wasting time. Madfis states, “many men who commit mass shootings tend to be those who have failed to achieve financial and romantic success in ways that our society values and accredits as “manly” (Madfis). Men are always trying to prove how manly they are, which takes a toll in their mental health. Another important part of masculinity is the amount of women man can get. If a man can’t get a girl, they are portrayed as something out of this world.
In the shooting committed in May 2014 had a lot of variables of cause to be part of the big issue of toxic masculinity. At the age of 22, Elliot Rodger took the lives of 6 innocent people. He was very young and had a life forward as he was attending Santa Barbara City College. The crime committed in May started when he killed two of his roommates, Weihann David Wang and Cheng Yuan James Hongand. His friend George Chen was killed the same way shortly after his roommates. According to a Santa Barbara County Sheriff’s Office investigative summary, Rodger drove to the streets of Isla Vista, where he opened fire and hit people with his car. He was trying to go in a UC Santa Barbara sorority house but failed.
Rodger was active on social media and posted videos of what he felt or was going through. One of the reasons why he did what he did was to get revenge of women. He felt like woman were constantly going for the wrong men. He was very isolated from any women connection which frustrated him because Rodger believe he was good man to be with. He left a 141-page document that talked about his upbringing, his mental health and hatred for women. He stated that his was unhappy for being a virgin at the age of 22.
Roder states “After I picked up the handgun, I brought it back to my room and felt a new sense of power. ‘Who’s the alpha male now, bitches!” ( Rodger). He felt like he had the right to do this crime because he was going through something done by society. His way of thinking was similar to traditional forms of masculinity. You are the best man for the number of girls you get. That is one important part of a man. Sexual competition for men has always been present, but women appear to not care about this type of competition.
In many of these mass shootings, the desire to kill seems to be driven by a catastrophic sense of male entitlement.
This list is some of what men are program to feel towards sex. Men’s desire should be never stop and strong, should always be in the mood for sex, should initiate all sexual activity, and men should never say no to any sexual opportunity. Men are taught to oppose Masculinity femininity. Women needs are not important only their wellbeing. Men are taught that their manhood comes from their ability to dominate women and that it’s wrong for them to act “like women.” This often means that sex where women are degraded is the best. When this form of masculinity is present no one has a moment, they feel satisfied. It also means men have a lower chance into finding someone to invest emotionally.
Men are always being judge so they have to be careful of what they are doing, as they can’t act feminine in anyway. Men can only pursue women. They’re also dissuaded from pursuing anything that could potentially be interpreted as girly or gay. For example, foe men being submissive during sex or following after women is a big no to manhood. Lastly they are taught to fear and stand against anyone sexuality is different. This is by far the most harmful idea as they become unhappy not trying to show their real side of the story. Some men who are gay rather stay quiet as they don’t want to disprove societies standard, which can later grow as anger and frustration.
Men are made to believe like they are entitled in anyway. They are always in charge and a woman response is not valid. In our society a man is conditioned to become aggressive and are not used to having a no for an answer. This thinking has led to many cases of sexual assault. In movies, men are portrayed as the one who forces a kiss and keeps asking for someone after being told they are not interested. All they are doing is harassing on for the simple fact of being a man. No one can tell them no without getting mad.
From the mass murder committed by Elliot Rodger and all the assaults committed from men something must be done so the hate they commit will never happen again. Rodger was not sexually active, and women were never paying attention to him. That and the fact he felt alone made him commit the murders. In this society is important for men to show off their women and the volumes of friends. We must stop teaching masculinity and the idea that men should have any women they like. We must stop sexualizing pairs of opposites in which men are condition to be masculine. Everyone has the right of freedom.
On June 12, 2016, Omar Mateen committing a hate crime towards gays. He cost the life of 49 innocent people. In the article from the independent, Sitora Yusufiy, Mateen’s ex-wife, claimed that the gunman had “gay tendencies” and was accused of being gay by his father on numerous occasions (Staples). Mateen was described as a regular to the gay nightclub. They have even stated that he was chatting with a gay man.
Mateen was your typical men with toxic masculinity. He was abusive with his ex-wife and was never the person he wanted to be. He feared not being accepted to society. Now a days many people are still not in support of gay relationships and them starting a family. So that is why they feel trap. You can’t be a real man if you support the gay community.